New Pope is Already Dead!

I won't even talk about how this new pope was in the Hitler Youth as a kid, I'm more worried about the fact he is already a walking bag of bones. This guy is already 78 years old. I guess the Vatican loved all the media attention they had from the death of the last pope and decided they could do it like the Olympics, once every 4 years or so. Back in the Middle Ages, Popes led Crusades against fierce opposing armies. This guy couldn't lead an army against ferocious 4 month old puppies. The last pope was nominated at a younger age and then deteriorated. This guy is already there with one foot in the grave! I guess that was what they were looking for.
Well, I mean I can see where all the confussion comes from. You wonder why they are so secretive about the meeting? Everyone is waiting outside for white smoke huh.... well if they got some good shit, they could conceivably elect anyone, especially this Kraut. It's like the Catholic version of Beer Goggles. Oh well, just wait for this pointless figure head to make the news again in another 4 years with another puff of white smoke.